(If you haven’t read the part 1 of Dear Love please read it first at the following link- https://liljedi.wordpress.com/2014/05/21/dear-love/)
You don’t know how excited I was when I saw your call. 10:13 pm. I still remember the exact time! Same day. My phone buzzed. I saw your name on the screen. But I was scared. What would I do? What would I say to you? What would we talk? I was so nervous that I couldn’t even receive the call. Before I swiped the screen to receive it, the call ended. I don’t know I was happy or sad. Happy, cause you called me and sad, cause I did that moronic thing, which I’m famous for, once again.
I instantly messaged my ‘love guru’- my cousin. He is a few years elder to me and is an extremely intelligent guy. He has a solution to everything. And he’s friendly with me so I talk to him everything. Of all the other things, the one thing he said was, “Call her moron!!! Call her. Or text or do something”.
Talking to him did not reduce my anxiety in any way. Rather it increased it manifold. But one thing that I was certain was that I must call you. I knew I had to call you. After all the stupid things I did, there had to be one right thing that I did.
So I just looked into my call logs, took out your number and tapped on call.
Tringg tringgg….I could hear the phone ring. But I could hear my heart beat more clearly- faster and louder.
Three times it rang before you picked up.
‘Hi..!’, you said.
There was silence for some moments. I just choked. I was searching for my voice. And all I could say was-
‘How are you?’, you asked.
‘I’m fine. And you?’, I said.
We had talked so many times before. But it seemed as if it was our first time.
‘I’m fine too. And how was your exam?’ , you replied back.
‘Hope it goes well. Else my dad will kick me out of the house.’
I tried to lighten up the mood. And it worked. I heard you laughing.
‘And yours will be great, as always.’ I added.
‘I don’t know. Let’s wait for the results..’, you said in you cute worried way.
‘I missed you’. Suddenly our conversation took a more serious course that I knew was coming.
‘I missed you too’. I didn’t know when a drop of tear rolled down my left cheek as I replied back.
‘Why didn’t you talk to me then’, I heard you sobbing.
I took some time before I could find words-
‘I had to keep my promise. I wished good for you and had to keep myself away from you for your own good…for our good. And moreover I thought you don’t like me anymore…the way you behaved…’
I stopped before saying anything more.
‘You fool! I behaved such to make you jealous. So that you talk to me again. So that at least you fight with me or ask what did I do? I always gave you a hint.’
A girl’s mind is the most mysterious thing on the earth. My ‘love guru’ always keeps on saying. Now I realize that. How am I supposed to know that you like me when you show exactly the opposite? Anyway I liked hearing all these. I was happy that after almost a year we talked. Time flies so fast. It seemed just like yesterday I was at your home and we’re deciding on not to talk to each other. And now after all this time, it still feels so fresh, so new once again. As if I’m falling in love with you for the first time. I fell in love with you yet again. I will fall in love with you over and over again.
We talked about a lot of things. Girls really know how to continue a conversation. Most of the time I was on the hearing side. I like hearing your sweet voice. And I had heard you after so long, that made my feeling even more intense. The tuitions together, the walk together to your home, the occasional walk in some random street- all the sweet memories came back to my mind and that brought a constant smile on my face throughout our conversation. And even later.
‘I’m leaving ’, finally you said that thing which I didn’t want to hear.
‘When?’, I asked.
‘Day after tomorrow’, you said.
I was silent.
‘Can you meet me’, you said breaking the silence.
‘Yes of course’, I replied.
‘I have arranged a small get together for some of the friends before I leave. Can you come tomorrow at 12. My mother is arranging for lunch’, you said.
‘That sounds cool’, I said.
We ended the call shortly after that. Meanwhile my ‘love guru’ was texting me. I texted him back, ‘I called’. He replied excitedly that I made him proud, that I’m his brother bla bla..
I forgot to reply him back. I was drowned in your fantasies. I didn’t know when I fell asleep.
Next day I was at your place. The driver dropped me and was to pick me up later. Some of our other friends were also there. So it was a usual affair. But you mother was happy to see me after all these days. And she treated me with more love than for the others. I could see that. All the while I wanted to be a little alone with you, but we never had the chance.
My phone buzzed and I saw a text from my ‘love guru’. I had texted him in the morning and told him about going to your place today. He was eager to know what’s going on. I replied ‘just with my friends’. I looked up and saw a look of annoyance on your face. I kept my phone aside. My ‘love guru’ kept bombarding my phone with questions.
The day ended. We had our lunch. You mother cooked awesome as always. And all our friends left. I had intentionally told the timing one hour late to my driver. So he had not yet showed up. We two were alone, in your study room. It was beautifully decorated with posters of barbies and all. I don’t quite remember what we talked or how we spent the time. All the while I was just trying to capture your face in my mind, before you left. And how desperately I wanted to kiss that cute face of yours! But I could not gather the guts.
It was time to go. My driver had come. You came to drop me to the door. I got into my car and the driver started the car. As we just moved, I shouted the driver to stop the car. I said I left my phone. I ran back to you. You were right there, at the gate looking towards me. I could see the sadness on your face-the pang of separation. I stood still in front of you for some seconds. I could hear my heart pounding. A smile came in your face comforted me. Swiftly, I gave a peck on your cheek. I saw you blushed. You looked even cuter when you blushed. The red colour on your face-the colour of love. I gave another peck on the other cheek. I tucked in something in your hand and ran back to my car.
The driver showed me the phone that was right beside him, gave a wink and started to drive.
PS: It was note saying I’ll find something at my doorstep next morning. I got up too early next morning and saw an envelope. I wondered when you dropped it . It had two letters. I read these letters with the same anxiety even today after so many years,with which I read it the first time.